June 11th, 2010
On my way to the art museum, I was contemplating how often a woman is warned that she may need to have labor induced because her baby is “too big”.
“You don’t know how big the baby is until it’s born” I was thinking. Then I turned the the corner and saw Mother Earth in her crowning glory. I laughed…. “That’s a big baby”. 
Big babies are healthy babies. In the last month of pregnancy your baby puts on a particular ‘brown fat’. Nature has prepared for your baby to use this as fuel in the first week. It is energy to help your baby to stay warm and make the transition to life outside the womb.
In the last two weeks of pregnancy, your baby’s lungs and brain continue with very important development. That’s a good reason to let labor start on it’s own, rather than induce for possibly a large size.
Ultrasounds are not highly accurate in the last weeks, how can anyone definitively state a baby is “too big”? This implies the mother is too small. And yet, there is a lot of variation in one mother’s pelvic width. Squatting, sitting backwards on a chair, leaning over a bed can open the pelvis a few centimenters wider. That helps your baby move to a good birthing position. Changing position also helps you avoid getting ‘stuck’, mentally and physically.
Letting labor start on it’s own is assurance that your baby is ready to be born. When the mothers’ body is ready, she usually needs less interventions to make progress. Having the company of someone who believes in your abilities and values your experience makes a difference, too.
No matter what the estimated size, continue your research about healthy labors and be patient with yourself and your beautiful, ‘big’ baby.
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April 14th, 2010
Spending an hour playing guitar is a simple pleasure of mine. While pregnant with my first, I’d imagined playing guitar while my baby napped. But in reality, there was a more often a baby in my lap, not a guitar, for the next several years.
One day, a decade after our youngest was born, I went to a music store. I sat down with an elegant classical guitar. My fingers still knew a simple allegretto and, for the first time in a long time, I began to play.
It was wonderful. An intricate melody emerged into the air, lifted my heart and then… was gone as the last note faded. I thought “This is what birth feels like”.
It’s a subtle, ethereal moment when you realize you just brought forth something unique and beautiful. Then, your muscles shake, the baby squeals, and the moment evaporates. Yet, that moment was there.
Labor and birth are alot like music. Both require persistance, a positive discipline and repetition (over and over, that breathing rhythm). And you get frustrated at times, there can be dissonance and sour notes. But what is inspiring is that feeling of creating something beautiful.
c. text and photo R. Snyder-Drummond 2010
Tags: guitar, music, rhythm
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March 12th, 2010
Making good, solid, slow-rising bread is something I enjoy. It’s a centuries old process of mixing, kneading and waiting that hasn’t been markedly improved upon. For me, the simple pleasure is in using my hands and feeling something grow over the course of the day.
I’m surprised when people remark, “It must be hard. Did you use a machine?” It seems to me that a bread machine only eliminates having to attend to each of the steps. You will always need yeast, sugar, warmth and, no way around it, time.
Here are the fundamentals:
Combine yeast, water, a little sugar and flour.
Wait while it rises. 
To that swelling mixture, add salt, oil, more flour, knead it with your hands.
Wait and let that rise.
Shape it and wait while it rises.
Put it in the oven and wait until you smell the warm bread.
I often think bread making is like labor support. Both require planning ahead and patience but neither require a strict schedule. Both are something that develops over time, usually several hours. While you are letting it progress, you can do other things: read, draw, nap, take a walk, eat. Hurrying the process doesn’t usually improve the result.
And with labor, as with bread making, when you are all done, you have reason to be proud and to make a toast.
Here is a good book of recipes and thoughtful guidance by Edward Espe Brown.
The Tassajara Bread Book.
text and photo c.2010 R. Snyder-Drummond
Tags: bread, labor, patience, preparation, slow, Tassajara, Zen
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January 26th, 2010
It was 3 days past my ‘due’ date, I was quite content to wait for signs of labor from my baby. We discussed this at my prenatal visit so it was on my mind as I walked the 3 miles back home.
It was a cloudy grey December afternoon in Chicago. The trees were bare, there was salty winter dust in the wind. It was a colorless, uninspiring and featureless landscape.And then, there in the middle of wide sidewalk, I saw a large quartz crystal.
Where had this come from? I looked all around but there was no one in sight. Could this have dropped from space? I picked the crystal up, it filled the palm of my hand. It had solidity and hardness. It was cloudy in some parts and tinged with a very subtle pink.
I put it in my pocket, thinking “This must be an omen”! I would surely give birth to my baby soon. I kept the crystal with me and for five more days, I was still pregnant. One afternoon, the crystal split cleanly and evenly in two. Ah! this was definitely an omen. And for three more days, I remained robustly pregnant.
It was eleven days past her due date when our baby was born. She arrived in her own time, at her own pace on a chilly January dawn in Chicago. I did notice that her birth day was the first sunny morning in a month of grey.
Of all the things that may influence labor and a baby’s birth: amulets, the weather, the baby, I feel that patience is the most important.
As for that crystal, I share it with my daughter. To me, it represents the unexpected, the mystery and the surprising arrival of something unique and beautiful in my hands.
text and photo c.2010 R. Snyder-Drummond
Tags: Chicago, patience, postdates
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December 24th, 2009
When I met Bea, she had been laboring for a day at the hospital. The nurse felt doula support would help.
Bea’s eyes were closed, we spoke very little though she appreciated suggestions. Ultimately Bea needed a cesarean. I was with her in the O.R. and until she and her baby were settled together.
I knew very little about Bea but I’d been present at her labor and felt special care was deserved. When I offered a home visit, she accepted.
Bea lived with five male cousins and nephews. There were no women around. As a mother and a woman, I improvised rituals to honor her and her new baby. I began by offering to make hot tea but she declined.
We were alone in the quiet apartment, sitting with her baby. When I asked his name, she said it meant 
Friday, his birth day, in her native language. Bea didn’t venture further conversation. I offered to do something helpful and she mentioned laundry.
I brought her clothes to the bathroom and ran water in the tub. I knelt on the floor and began wringing her clothes. A few yards away, in the bedroom, Bea knelt on the floor and massaged her baby. She stroked his arms and legs with oil and sang in her native language. It was a song that I also knew.
Through many dangers, strain and strife
I have already come
Tis Grace that led me safe thus far
and Grace will lead me home.
She sang, I hummed, we washed and soothed together. We could have been in Ghana or India. We were in an apartment in Massachusetts.
Small moments of connection and calm are important, especially in the tender first weeks. I hope she will remember: two mothers, two languages, one song of Grace.
text and photo c. R.Snyder-Drummond 2009
Tags: Amazing Grace, postpartum, song, support
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December 13th, 2009
There’s an air of festivity when the first snow arrives. It’s something I look forward to… shovels and a basket of mittens ready. When the first accumulation begins, I take a deep breath of the crisp snow smell and begin my winter rituals.
Labor and birth are like Winter in New England. You know it’s going to happen, but you don’t know how strong or long it will be. There are practical things you should do to prepare. 
All labors require your patience and calm attention. You may very well be ‘occupied’ for 36 hours so realistically consider what you need to organize. Here’s an exercise my colleague Carolyn Ogren uses in teaching expectant families (and doulas-in-training),
What if labor started now?
• A Saturday evening at 11 p.m. Would you need to cancel something important? Would someone be available to walk your dog in the morning?
• A Tuesday at 2 p.m. Can you easily wrap up your work? Do you have a small bag with snacks, change of clothes, music in your car? If labor is long, is there someone who can be your back up support person?
Years ago, my doula partner Pam and I were meeting with an expectant mother. She was particularly anxious about getting to the hospital in time. We discussed her concern, came up with a few options and reaffirmed that she lived only a few blocks away. Finally, Pam said “It usually works out the way it’s supposed to be.” and that felt like a perfectly adequate answer. Many times we’d seen how mothers waited for a sibling to settle, friend or partner to arrive, a winter storm to pass.
It usually works out. Nonetheless, it will help to make your preparations. Then take a deep breath and enjoy what unfolds.
photo and text c.2009 R.Snyder-Drummond
Tags: Carolyn, labor, mothers, partners, preparation
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November 30th, 2009
As an expectant parent, it’s easy to feel that other people know more, are the experts, have more experience. “It’s our first, so we really don’t know anything” I often hear. Yet, I would like to validate how much you really do know.
As a pregnant woman in your sixth month, you’ve already spent 3,552 waking and sleeping hours with your baby. You know the active moments; feel growth spurts and changes in position. As an adult, you have lived with yourself for decades already. You know what things make you laugh or growl and you feel your body change with your baby.
How you feel, physically and emotionally, is significant information. It’s important to trust what your body tells you. Here are some practical routines to develop your trust in your body.
1. Make space every day for at least 10 minutes to breathe deeply and find calmness. Make this a habit, like brushing your teeth.
Breathing deeply gets more oxygen to your brain and muscles. It calms your body and heart, clears your mind.
2. Exercise a positive attitude by reviewing the gifts of your health.
When confronted with a challenge or problem, first ask “What is working here?”. That way you will be starting from a position of strength an then it’s easier to find and absorb more information to consider what your choices are.
For quality information, here are three excellent resources:
www.childbirthconnection.org
The Birth Partner: A Complete Guide to Childbirth for Dads, Doulas and All Other Labor Companions
Penny Simkin
The Doula Guide: Secrets Every Pregnant Woman Should Know
Ananda Lowe and Rachel Zimmerman.
Because you’re the one going home with this baby and this experience, it’s important to trust what your body tells you. You’ll find this is a skill you’ll continue to develop as a parent.
c. Robin Snyder-Drummond 2009
Tags: babies, body, families, health, intuition, knowledge, trust
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